The 40s had to be a truly scary time for a woman. How can I make fun of an ad that reads like this? "Romance is all bound up with feminine daintiness. Even the most loving husband may find it difficult to forget - or forgive- a wife's carelessness, or ignorance, about intimate personal cleanliness. That's why so many women use 'Lysol' regularly." No wonder our grandparents were sometimes so screwed up!
And yes. Lysol used to be used.. "down there".

This is insanely disturbing on many levels, but OH, I love it so.

Look, mom! Wait. What the hell are those other things on the plate? Yes. The height of food technology. Skinless Weiners. Skinless weiners and weird round things, and long things wrapped in red. Ick. Would it be appropriate to feed skinless weiners to a hairless cat? And what, pray tell, actually held them together? That's probably a question that's best left unanswered.

Oh! It's been too long. I'm so sorry! So for today, it's short and sweet. From May, 1967.

Sadly, that ad is all too true. Hello, bailout!

Oh, for the love of.... really? PANTIES? This poor child. I hope he was paid handsomely for this. Being known as the "Staydry panties" boy, can be awfully damaging!
Bonus-- even in 62, the zip code system wasn't in place, so it still has that old timey addressey feel!

No! No! This will never do! Our A.D.D. generation will never make it through that story! Make it simple! Make it snappy! I have to admit, when I see these ads with the mini novel attached, I sometimes wonder how that approach would work with newer products. I doubt the form will ever make a comeback. Now it's buy, buy buy! buy now! Buy quickly! 25 cents off! Limited time!! Special offer! No C.O.D.s!

AARGH! Who doesn't hate "Sandpaper Throat"? I DO! I've got it! I hate being sick! Yuck! I wish I could shop for medicine that was this easy to choose. Sandpaper throat? Yep. Got it. The closest we get now is the "nighttime sniffling sneezing stuffy head so you can get your rest medicine". Back in 1946, it was all so simple! I guess this approach didn't necessarily catch on, or I'm sure we would have heard of hose nose, faucet eyes, and gravel lips.
By the way, some of us really DO look like that when we feel miserable, too. Waaah!